I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
