Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
