dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
