finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize