So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
