Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
How external is "for external use only"?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
