i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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