Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I think people are normalizing furries
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
