I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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