Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Can I color on your dick again?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
