Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Randomize
