worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Panties = found
Randomize
