do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
