woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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