i need an iv and a liver transplant
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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