You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
