She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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