I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize