Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
