they need to just BURY HIM!
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
