so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
