Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
i out mim tonsoeep
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