Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
