don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize