i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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