Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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