ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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