Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Boobs speak an international language.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
