Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
