If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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