Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
did i just pee glitter
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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