I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
