marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
this hospital has no fireball
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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