I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He kissed a someone with a penis
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
