whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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