Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
