I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
