Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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