This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
