Your tits are I can't wait for
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
