It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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