It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
