Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize