We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
