i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
