One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
