I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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