we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize