Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize