Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
