let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
