You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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